I’m a big “WHY” person. I’ve mentioned it in other posts before. I don’t like to do pointless or wasteful things. I don’t know why – I’m just that way. It may seem like a quality but it can also be a curse when it comes to the simple. And this year, with cancer, my struggles with “why” have never been more fierce. Not in the sense of ‘why’ me or ‘why’ cancer… I’m at peace with those, knowing God has a purpose for everything, I have taken the trial as a journey to shine Light and share His Word with staff and patients alike. No, my struggle with Why is more akin to purpose… if my time is going to be cut shorter than expected, why do a thing unless it has impact NOW and here for others, or later in eternity for and with God.

Again, a blessing and a curse.

Heading into the Christmas season this year on the heals of an almost-fall I had the week before Thanksgiving, twerking my back and ribs which are still rather brittle from the Myeloma feeding on them over the past two years, has left me uncomfortable and more run-down than expected. Energy and ability to DO the normal seasonal things like cook a little extra or decorate, is fleeing and discouraging. Christmastime blues kicked in even before Thanksgiving leftovers were finished.

Sunday, we shuffled decoration-filled boxes out of the attic and stacked them in their respective locations, most of the autumn décor now tucked back and leaving the walls a bit more bare. The job to spread warmth across our hearth and shelves, typically fully on me as it has been for over 30 years, suddenly felt overwhelming and pointless.

Why does any of this matter?

It is a season to celebrate the birth of Jesus. We don’t need trees or ornaments or wreaths or babbles to honor His coming. We don’t need presents or cookies or crafts. Yet, not having them is equally depressing. Again, WHY, what is the point?

In my melancholy way, I just couldn’t fathom the answers. The enemy of our souls was dancing around my heart, attempting to seed doubt and discouragement. He was gleefully telling me no one cares, none of this matters, it is all a waste. Darkness seemed to close in as these lies seemed so well disguised as truth.

Yet, I pushed through and began the work of the day. Preparing ornaments (a long family tradition of a new ornament for the tree each year, and this year I made a few extra!) to mail to my grown kids far away and looking through boxes of decorations, I tried to boost my mood with Christmas carols streamed through the vintage radio I keep in my office – but to no avail. The tears began to roll as the discouragement became almost too much to bear.

But then….
In the hands of God, I see now, the whispers He spoke to counter the lies and open my eyes to TRUTH.

• A conversation with my husband to dispel some misunderstandings which had fueled my melancholy
• Seasonal songs which spoke of how “these are things we remember our whole lives through” and I just knew in my spirit how the traditions and trappings of Christmas are not just something remembered now, in this life, but they also point to the warmth and joy of Jesus which carry us to the next life
• Morning Scripture reading which kept knocking at my heart, reminding me of how we are like John the Baptist; preparing a way where Jesus walks and others follow.

Yes, the tried and true voice of Isaiah, prophesying a future:

I began to see the helplines being tossed. The hope, the possibility, the answers to my WHY.

The wilderness: a wild and untamed place
A way is prepared: work to be done
In the desert: a baren place of empty and drought
Make a straight highway: direct and easier to travel
For God: He is coming and that gives HOPE

I thought, too, as I read and broke down this passage, of how we can’t always SEE how the work we do here and now is having any sort of impact. It isn’t always about knowing, often, it is simply about doing. John didn’t know when Jesus would enter the scene or how his work would impact – but he did it anyway. One of those things: once you see, you just can’t unsee… and then I thought of a verse which has guided my WHY heart for so many years:

So much of our faith walk, even in the day-to-day, is a conviction of the unseen, the unanswered WHYs of life. Yet, we also know from Scripture, this highway we can follow John’s example in preparing, doesn’t end its purpose in Christ’s feet traversing it; He is most certainly the leader in the journey, then we and others are to follow.

As Christmastime lays its warm blanket over the end of a long year, we can cut through the clutter and commercialism, the crowded wilderness of hustle and bustle the season often brings and see the desert, the drought, the need for light, love, peace, hope… and we can carve a path where others can SEE Jesus and follow His footprints on the highway ahead.

For me, revelation was beginning to answer the whys….
Whis is ornament making important?
It makes a straight highway in an otherwise crowded or baren land… receiving a decoration to be used year after year and knowing the kindness and love and time it took to make (and send/give). For our family, it is a tradition which spreads a feeling of love, thoughtfulness, and belonging all anchored in the character of Christ.

Why is decorating important?
It makes a straight highway in an otherwise crowded or baren land… as we and guests enjoy the comfort and coziness of open hearth-open heart-open home. Not necessarily spending all the money or putting up all the things it can simple be some twinkle lights and lovingly placed decorations which make a house a home: warm, cozy, inviting, comforting. When we or others are enveloped in its glow, we feel the warm arms of God saying peace and be still… like the one-day home prepared for us in heaven.

Why are gifts important?
It makes a straight highway in an otherwise crowded or baren land… as the receiver remembers the giver and the heart and faith the gift was given with not just in the moment of receiving, but a lifetime-through. Not in a way of pointing to self – rather, we are Light holders, Jesus gets the ultimate glory a gift brings.

The list of Christmastime doings could go on. I have written at-length about other traditions over the years and how we can follow the early church fathers lead by ceasing the secular and revamp/reviving it for the sacred – object lessons to share Christ and draw those who need Him (or more of Him) in their lives… a highway through wilderness and deserts to springs of hope and Life.

Christmas and all its trappings matter because CHRIST matters – and our attitude in all of it matters too. It may seem like a whole lotta whoop for nothing, however, it is like the song says, this one-time-a-year really is ‘remembered the whole year/life through’. Once the highway is laid, it is traversed and well-warn, not just for one month – the one month may have set the path – but a well set path will not go away once decorations are removed and a new year dawns.

Let us build highways this, and each, Christmas!

Bake those delicious cookies
Decorate that shining tree
Hang the sprigs of holly
Give those loving chosen and brightly wrapped gifts
Share a candy cane with a smile
Lay the dinner settings with care

Remind others of Hope and Love which came down millennia ago – a gift we are blessed to open today.

Merry Christmas